Why was I questioning this kind woman in a village shop? It wasn't because I didn't think she was generous. In fact, due to a relationship established with her by another staff member from the home, this wasn't the first time she'd tossed in a free item with my purchase.
But lately I seem plagued with misunderstandings, and have found that more often than not I need to restate what I think I'm hearing, just to be sure I am clear about what is happening.
I found the sermon by Robert Madu on the blind man of Bethsaida to be very profound in this regard. Jesus brought the blind man outside of the city, spit in his eyes, and asked the man if he saw anything. This was weird for Jesus, as we have no other record of him checking in to see if his healing touch was working. And that it hadn't worked completely was odd too - was his power running out?
Robert Madu suggests that this was not, as some determine, something that shows the blind man's lack of faith. Instead, Robert puts forth the idea that this was a purposeful test of the man's honesty. Would he be honest with Jesus about his blurry condition?
We, as Christians in particular, don't want to admit when things are not clear. We feel like we have to act like we can see clearly. But if the blind man had answered, "Yeah, I'm good, I'm good... it's better than it was before," he never would have received the clarity he sought.
Robert Madu goes on to propose that blurry is a blessing. It is a blessing because, when things are blurry, it makes us lean in to try to see better. Lean in toward God. Our blurry makes us pray, it makes us seek Him, it makes us raise our hands and say "God, only You know."
This helps me take courage in my current leadership role, tackling communication with those around me in a different language and culture in a way that exposes my vulnerability, but also helps me avoid some unnecessary misunderstandings.
And it also helps me feel peace in my "faith walk," as, for a while now, I've felt blurry on a few things. I have been quite honest with God about this blurriness, and have found beautiful freedom in trusting in Him as I wait for Him to make my vision more clear.
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